August 30, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for the gift of Cassidy. She is a wonderful person an deserves someone that will treat well. Thank you for comforting me and giving me the strength to reach out to her and apologize. I know it meant a lot to her and pushed me to become the man I want to be.

Please continue to guide me as I go through this transition in my life and strengthen me with courage.

Please watch over Kerstin an with her with comfort.

Love,

Mike

August 29, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for teaching me through your words and spirit to put others before myself.

Love,

Mike

August 28, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for the gift of my grandma. She is such a wonderful old lady and teaches me a lot. Even though she may drive my family nuts from time to time we still love her.

Thank you for the gift of Tim. He works me hard and pushes me to be the best I can be in the gym. I am learning to take that good energy and use it in my everyday life.

Thank you for you grace that you give us everyday. Without your grace I would not be able to move on from the mistakes I have made and make. Thank you for your forgiveness and giving me the opportunity to be better.

Please watch over those in the path of hurricane issac and give them the strength to recover when it's all over. Please watch over Kerstin in Atlanta.

Love,

Mike

August 27, 2012

Dear God,

Please protect those down south that are in the path of hurricane issac. They need you now more than ever. Please give them the strength to persevere this storm and have them come out stronger.

Thank you for guiding me on the path that I should have been walking long ago. Thank you for making me stronger, honest, forgiving and generous. I try my hardest to carry out your word. I may trip and stub my toe from time to time, but you give me the opportunity to fix everything. Thank you for forgiving me for my sins and mistakes. Thank you for being with me in my time of need. Thank you for the dreams you give me of Kerstin and I. I look forward to those every night and they put a smile on my face and give me hope.

Thank you for giving me the opportunity be improve myself and be a better person everyday when I wake up.

Love,

Mike

August 26, 2012

Dear God,

I just finished watching a phenomenal movie, Blue Like Jazz.  As I was watching it, the movie made me realize that I am no different than the people in the movie.  During my college career and early in to my professional life I was ashamed of you and really wanted to fit into the crowd.  I was being selfish and unfair to a lot of people and you, oh Lord.  I'm sorry I wasn't living out your word and living the way that you have intended for all of us to live.  We move in this fast world and we forget the meaning of life and become these selfish beings looking out for number 1, us.  I know that I am not perfect and I make mistakes, but I also know that by believing in you and having your forgiveness I will be able to live a peaceful life and have a clear conscience to spread your word.  You put Kerstin into my life to really show me the way and I ignored that, I am sorry I did that.  I hurt her and I hurt You.  I would like to make that up to her and apologize for my actions and ask for her forgiveness.  I know its hard for her to trust and forgive, but I would like to have the opportunity to help her and maybe she can still help me without any ignorance from me.  I love her so much not only because she is the most beautiful human being inside and out, but I can see you in her.   Please give me the strength for affirming our relationship and choosing love over myself.

Love,

Michael

August 25, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for such wonderful friends and family. They mean the world to me. Thank you for giving me the strength to get through the long day and the triathlon. I really needed that.

Love,

Mike

August 24, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for giving me a great challenge at work. I'm up for it an know I can get the job done. Thank you for the gift of Mark. He means a lot to me and is a really good friend.

Please continue to watch over me as I grow through this tough time in my life. I know you are guiding me on the right path. I will continue to spread your word and get better at it as I keep moving forward.

Love,

Mike

August 23, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for blessing me with the running club. They are such wonderful people and always make me laugh and uplift me when I'm down.

Thank you for Emily she was a lovely girl and perfect for me to talk to right now. Its a blessing to know that there are people out there like Emily spreading your word. I hope to do the same and spread your good news.

I continue to miss her even more since I've started making this scrap book for her. It puts a smile on my face going through those pictures, but also makes me sad knowing I hurt her. I want to make this up to her as best I can. I love her so much and I believe we can be a great team in spreading your word and making each other very happy. Please watch over her and all of the people involved with Cru. Bless Emily and Matt as they talk to each other tonight. And please continue to give me strength and guidance as I go through this hard time in my life.

Love,

Mike

August 22, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for providing me with wonderful teachers in my life. Without them I wouldn't be able to learn from my mistakes, keep myself grounded and be true to myself and others. You gave me another great day. I feel your presence everywhere I go, it's like your guiding me down the right path towards righteousness.

I still miss her and wish I could hold her in my arms. I know she needs time, but how much time is enough time?

Please continue to guide me and give me strength to get through this hard time in my life and watch over Kerstin.

Love,

Mike

August 21, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for this wonderful day. I can tell you are making me stronger as a person and I have faith that you will guide me in the right direction of life. I feel like we are off to a good start after my screw up.

Please continue to guide me as I go through this tough time in my life.

Love,

Mike

Ps please watch over KK

August 20, 1012

Dear God,

Thank you for getting me through another tough day. With your grace I know I can get through anything.

Right now I need you more than ever. I miss her so much and just want to hold her close to me and never let go.she is the world to me. Please give me the strength to give her time. I know she needs it and that I need as well. But if you could do me a favor, if I could hear her voice soon, other than her voicemail, that would make me feel so much better. I just want to know how she is doing. Please make her string and guide her to the life she deserves.

Love,

Mike

August 19, 2012

Dear God,

I had a rather interesting day today.  It started off great, you had your palm on my head all morning.  I can't believe how hard you were working on me today.  You got me thinking about me for a change and what would make me happy.  See, I'm starting to realize that pretty much my whole life I was worrying about what other people thought of me and what I did/would do.  That's what caused my selfishness.  I would always be doing what, I thought, others wanted me to do which was the wrong thing because it angered me instead of made me happy.  But now with your guidance I was able to think and open up to my parents about what I wanted from life and how I want to live.  I was able to share what I was happy about and what I wasn't happy about in my life.

Thank you for giving me that strength to be open.  That's how I want to live, that's how I want to be.  I want to be true to you and everyone that I interact with.  I want to be dancing everyday of my life.  I want to be happy every morning that I wake up.  What makes me happy is when I can help someone accomplish their goals.

With your grace and my faith in you, I know that I can live the life you have planned for me.  I know I can worship you great on my own, but I know that with her by my side we can worship you better and spread your word better together than apart.  I am asking that you guide us on our own as we learn about ourselves, but I'm also asking that you guide us back together.

Thank you for this day.

Love,

Mike

August 18, 2012

Dear God,

I was thinking a lot bout her today. I was thinking how our relationship can't end because we have so many more things that we need to do with each other. I know I need to try to move on and live without her and live on my own, but I feel my life is great without her, but much better if we were together. I want to show her how much she means to me. I want to love her like no one has loved anyone before. I've always wanted to be great and the best at something and I think I know what that is. It's to love her and cherish her and our relationship.

Thank you for the fun round of golf today! I need a laugh like you gave us today. It means so much to me when that happens. I know we kid around with each other a lot, but it's all in good fun, we live each other. Thank you for giving me the conscience to pay for the socks. It feels so good to be honest and have peace of mind of knowing you did the right thing. Than you for waking me up this morning and I look forward to more days filled with conversations with you.

Love,

Mike

August 17, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for a great day today. I really needed your strength and you gave it to me. I miss her even more today, but I know with your guidance you will make is both happy. Thank you for my friend, and thank you for my parents. You have blessed me with so many wonderful people in my life. It's now my time to have faith in you and thank you for your grace. I will continue to do that until we meet I. Heaven.

Love,

Mike

August 16, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for giving me the strength to with hold my frustration on the golf course. I had a very hard day thinking about her today and a bad golf game didn't help. Thank you for comforting me when I needed it most. I know there will be better days, but I know with you by my side it makes the hard days easier. Please continue to give me strength during this hard time in my life.

I am very blessed to have such wonderful people in my life and I see you in them. Please continue to watch over them and everyone that I love.

Love,

Mike

August 15, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for giving me the strength to be patient on Dustin's and my way back to work after lunch.  He is a good kid and means well, but sometimes he can get to me and frustrate me.  With your guidance  I am able to stay patient and instead of getting frustrated at him, I can learn from him.  When I was talking to you on my way home from spin class today you gave me that beautiful sunset that looked gorgeous in the clouds.  When I see things like that I know your focusing a little more energy at that moment.  Thank you for giving me the strength to get through this day and come out a better person than I was going in.

Love,

Mike

August 14, 2012

Dear God,

Thank you for getting me through this day.  I was worried all day because of my dentist appointment. As you know, I'm not the biggest fan of the dentist.  You gave me the strength to get me through it and thank you for that.  As I'm going through these rough couple of days talking to you eases my pain and comforts me.  Please continue to give me and everyone else the strength and courage to get through our tough days.  I know there will be tougher days as life goes on, but knowing I have you will get me through them.

Love,

Mike

Introduction

Hello Everyone!  I've tried this blog thing once before, but I didn't really know what I wanted to say and how to say it.  I really forced myself into this blog world because I wanted to impress my girlfriend and show her that I can do this, but really I wasn't doing it for myself and wasn't expressing my real thoughts.  So I'm taking this chance to start over and express my true feelings by writing letters to God.

Let me start by introducing myself, my name is Mike Esser.  Some people call me Michael, others call me Mikey or even Junior because my dad has the same name as me.  I love to compete in triathlons and marathons, I love to golf and all around have a good time with others.  My day job is that I work in the prototype industry and help companies design and develop new products.

The reason I'm starting this blog is because I have recently learned something about myself.  I learned that I wasn't living the way or being the person that I want to be.  I was being selfish and made a few mistakes that hurt the people closest to me.  I want to turn things around, not necessarily press the reset button, but I want to start living the way I want to live and be the person that encourages others.  I believe the best way to do this is to have a strong, honest relationship with the guy in the sky, God.

So each day I've decided to write a letter to God......